• Anthony Dimitrion, LCSW, CCSC

So You're Looking to Buy Your First Sex Toy?

Purchasing your first sex toy can be an exciting and an intimidating process! One simple search on Google will lead to dozens of possibilities for vendor and product types. Well I'm here to help make the hunting process a bit easier. Below are some tips for purchasing a quality sex toy:




1) Purchase from a reputable vendor.

Amazon has made it wonderfully easy to purchase an item with the click of a button, but it can be difficult to determine which vendors are reputable and are selling authentic, quality sex toys. If deciding to search for a sex toy on Amazon, make sure to read reviews on the vendor and their products. You can also search the vendor on Google and review their website (if they have one) before making the purchase. I tend to encourage my clients to visit the local adult boutique shops in their area. A good adult boutique has employees who are knowledgeable about the products and which products might be best for a first timer. You can also search the web for boutiques that specialize in selling sex toys.


2) Avoid Jelly, Lifelike, & Cyberskin Toys

While toys made from jelly, cyberskin, and mixed silicone are softer, more flexible, and lifelike, they contain chemicals such as PVC, BPA, Bisphenol A, and pthalates. These chemicals are known endorcrine disruptors that can cause infertility, obesity, cancer, diabetes, and heart disease.


Jelly, cyberskin, and mixed silicone toys are often more porous and difficult to thoroughly clean. Because it is more porous bacteria can get caught in the toy and potentially cause infections.


What should a quality sex toy be made out of?

Look for products that are made out of 100% silicone. Other products that are safe may be made from glass, stainless steal, or elastomed (medical grade plastic).


3) If purchasing a dildo, decide whether you need a flared, flat, or no base.

When purchasing a dildo first decide how you will be using it. Will it be for vaginal play, anal play, oral play, all three? If using it for anal play, be sure that there is a flat or flared base. This will prevent the dildo from getting stuck and leading to an awkward trip to the hospital.


Also be sure that the dildo is made from one of the safe materials listed above.


4) Price range correlates with quality and longevity of the toy.

This does not mean that you must purchase the most expensive toy on the market. There are many great sex toys in the mid-price range. Just know that toys on the cheap end most likely contain the harmful chemicals listed in #2 and may not last as long as the mid-high price range toys.


5) Size, function, and intention for use matter.

When purchasing a sex toy take into consideration the toy's size and its function. Are you looking for something discrete to put in your purse or a travel bag? Do you want to incorporate it into your partnered sex life? Do you want it for anal play, vaginal play, clitoral play? Do you want one that vibrates, oscillates, or sucks? Having an idea of your intentions for its use will help narrow down your available options.

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LGBTQ+ Affirmative Therapist in Ridgewood, NJ 07450.